So this weekend I went to a college friend’s baby shower. I didn’t know exactly how to get there so I met up other college friends at one of their houses and we all went together in one car. We talked on the way over there and just when we were about to arrive we got stuck in a traffic jam. But this was no ordinary jam, this was caused by [as always is in Puerto Rico] a political campaign”parade”. I say “parade” because it consists of a long-ass row of cars with flags, people in pick-ups, and big trucks with loud music blasting through them. To say it was a little jam is an understatement.
What should have been a 5 minute journey from the highway to my friend’s house ended up being an hour long journey. It was fascinating [not!]. We got to the place and it was beautifully decorated [pink, black and white] filled with balloons and a candy bar [yum!]. The hors d’oeuvres were exquisite and the food was delicious [since I ate candy I just had some salad and cordon-bleu chicken wrapped in bacon :)]. Now, all this seems perfect except that I felt a little out of place. It seemed that I no longer had anything in common with my college friends. As they all talked away I found myself trying to look for topics to discuss with them, and I realized that I try hard to relate to them and that maybe we’ve grown apart. Now I do have some old dorm friends that’s easy for me to talk to and relate, but they live far away [other countries] and we can’t go out as we used to. But we keep in touch and hang out whenever we all can.
Back to my other friends, I never really felt part of their “group” but I used to get invited to hang with them more often than I am now. And it’s not just because I got married, it was happening way before I said my I dos. But in a way I really don’t mind because what they talk about I feel like I can’t relate to anymore. I realized that they like to talk about people more than I would like to and since I don’t know most of the people they talk about I really can’t contribute to the conversation [all the better quite frankly]. They remember things and experiences that I don’t because I wasn’t present. And they are way more flamboyant than I am.
This used to bug me a lot, not being able to relate to my dorm college friends, but I realized that I don’t have to anymore. I can just enjoy their company whenever they call upon it and when they don’t I won’t feel bad or left out anymore. Because I meeting new people, single friends and couples that I’m finding I can relate to a little easier. We have the same interests and the conversation never feels forced. I came to terms that people change, as do friendships and while some last a lifetime others kind of dissipate with time. I don’t try to hold on anymore to these old friendships that are bound to change [and sometimes end] and I am now open to the new ones that come my way. In the end it’s not just my friends who have changed but me as well. My interests and ideals have changed and I am now surrounding myself with people that share the same. We all change and that’s a fact, we just have to accept it for what it is and stop trying to make things the way they used to be.